Let me tell you a bit about Pepe. I first met him in Prague when I holidayed there in 2006. I liked him so much that I decided to bring him home with me. You may wonder then why he has a French name. Well he’s originally from France. He’s a well-travelled dog.
After 4 years in the steamy obscurity of our bathroom, he’s now found fame and adulation. Such is Pepe’s following that on his outing yesterday he was dog-knapped. At 5.39pm yesterday I received this most disturbing of text messages: £3m cash or Pepe snuffs it. It was accompanied by this picture. The flame perilously close to Pepe’s wooden footwear caused me to fear for his safety…
After a high-level Inspector Clueso style investigation the culprits were apprehended.
The plot was to kidnap Pepe and take him out for the evening. Who knows what would have happened had Pepe fallen into these six hands! Quelle horreur!!!
Pepe was quite shaken after his ordeal. You can tell by his ears.
He thought a drink or three might calm his nerves
Pepe starts to feel more like his old self so entertains us all with his one-dog-band show.
Pepe did a little yoga before bed
What a day for Pepe!
Where do you think the next Z Factor winner should be taken?