Let me tell you a bit about Pepe. I first met him in Prague when I holidayed there in 2006. I liked him so much that I decided to bring him home with me. You may wonder then why he has a French name. Well he’s originally from France. He’s a well-travelled dog.
After 4 years in the steamy obscurity of our bathroom, he’s now found fame and adulation. Such is Pepe’s following that on his outing yesterday he was dog-knapped. At 5.39pm yesterday I received this most disturbing of text messages: £3m cash or Pepe snuffs it. It was accompanied by this picture. The flame perilously close to Pepe’s wooden footwear caused me to fear for his safety…